Secrets of Happy Moms
Have you ever noticed how some Moms seem to be very
contented and confident in their role as Mothers, and
others seem chronically stressed and approaching
burnout? Why are some Moms unflappable and able to
keep their sense of humor, while others overreact to the
slightest stressors in their day?
I'm currently observing and interviewing these happy Moms
as I conduct research for an upcoming book. While all
Moms are different, these women usually have several of
the following traits in common.
1) They keep it simple.
I know one Mom who grocery shops every two weeks and
buys the exact same thing every time to prepare the same
menu of 14 dinners. Why does she do this? She's picked
the family's favorite meals for her menu to save herself time
and arguments at the dinner table. Anyone with kids knows
they like to eat the same things over and over! This Mom
has decided not to reinvent the wheel twice a month. This is
just one example of keeping it simple.
2) They teach their kids to be independent.
This doesn't mean they leave them to their own devices all
day. But a smart Mom knows that a 2 year old can put a
dish in the dishwasher, a 4 year old can prepare his own
peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and a 7 year old can
sweep a floor (albeit imperfectly!). Call it "outsourcing" for
Moms.
3) They drop the SuperMom complex.
Not sweating the small stuff seems to be a common trait of
happy Moms. They learn to pick their battles. Getting
buckled into a car seat? Not negotiable. Pink paisley pants
with the orange plaid shirt? Fashion creativity.
Happy Moms also realize that being an awesome Mom
doesn't mean being a perfect Mom. 'Nuff said.
4) They can often be overheard repeating the phrase "This
too shall pass".
It doesn't mean that bothersome behavior in kids should be
overlooked, for discipline is a huge time saver in the end. It
means that Moms realize that children are...well, uncivilized
creatures, and that much uncivilized behavior will simply go
away on its own as the child matures. Smart Moms are also
keenly aware of their child's development and don't expect
more of them than they are able to give.
5) Smart Moms take care of themselves.
They don't blame the baby for their extra weight when the
baby in question is potty trained! They put emphasis on
good nutrition, avoiding too much by way of stimulants
(caffeine, sugar), they get adequate rest, and daily
exercise. They realize that you can't pour from an empty
bucket.
6) They live in the moment.
Happy Moms realize that the days are long but the years
short. It's not that they are impervious to stress, it's that
they have learned to lower their expectations and be in the
moment when things get difficult. When your toddler is
puking all over the house, this is not the time to reorganize
the hall closet. A sick day then turns into a time to create
sweet memories of hours spent reading and cuddling on
the couch.
7) They don't worry about what others think.
Whether it's the disapproving glare from the old lady in the
checkout line, the Mother in law who is convinced you're
starving the baby by breastfeeding, or the Pediatrician
whose medical advice strays into parenting advice, happy
Moms learn not to give too much weight to the opinions of
those who don't live in their home.
8) In other words, they trust their instincts.
Whether it's taking the baby to bed with them so they can
get more sleep or taking a bullied child out of public school,
smart Moms know that they are the expert of their own
babies.
9) Happy Moms have "something else"
It may be a part time home based business or a hobby like
belly dancing. These Moms know that some day their
babies will fly the coop, and they make sure they have a
passion that will give them purpose when that happens.
contented and confident in their role as Mothers, and
others seem chronically stressed and approaching
burnout? Why are some Moms unflappable and able to
keep their sense of humor, while others overreact to the
slightest stressors in their day?
I'm currently observing and interviewing these happy Moms
as I conduct research for an upcoming book. While all
Moms are different, these women usually have several of
the following traits in common.
1) They keep it simple.
I know one Mom who grocery shops every two weeks and
buys the exact same thing every time to prepare the same
menu of 14 dinners. Why does she do this? She's picked
the family's favorite meals for her menu to save herself time
and arguments at the dinner table. Anyone with kids knows
they like to eat the same things over and over! This Mom
has decided not to reinvent the wheel twice a month. This is
just one example of keeping it simple.
2) They teach their kids to be independent.
This doesn't mean they leave them to their own devices all
day. But a smart Mom knows that a 2 year old can put a
dish in the dishwasher, a 4 year old can prepare his own
peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and a 7 year old can
sweep a floor (albeit imperfectly!). Call it "outsourcing" for
Moms.
3) They drop the SuperMom complex.
Not sweating the small stuff seems to be a common trait of
happy Moms. They learn to pick their battles. Getting
buckled into a car seat? Not negotiable. Pink paisley pants
with the orange plaid shirt? Fashion creativity.
Happy Moms also realize that being an awesome Mom
doesn't mean being a perfect Mom. 'Nuff said.
4) They can often be overheard repeating the phrase "This
too shall pass".
It doesn't mean that bothersome behavior in kids should be
overlooked, for discipline is a huge time saver in the end. It
means that Moms realize that children are...well, uncivilized
creatures, and that much uncivilized behavior will simply go
away on its own as the child matures. Smart Moms are also
keenly aware of their child's development and don't expect
more of them than they are able to give.
5) Smart Moms take care of themselves.
They don't blame the baby for their extra weight when the
baby in question is potty trained! They put emphasis on
good nutrition, avoiding too much by way of stimulants
(caffeine, sugar), they get adequate rest, and daily
exercise. They realize that you can't pour from an empty
bucket.
6) They live in the moment.
Happy Moms realize that the days are long but the years
short. It's not that they are impervious to stress, it's that
they have learned to lower their expectations and be in the
moment when things get difficult. When your toddler is
puking all over the house, this is not the time to reorganize
the hall closet. A sick day then turns into a time to create
sweet memories of hours spent reading and cuddling on
the couch.
7) They don't worry about what others think.
Whether it's the disapproving glare from the old lady in the
checkout line, the Mother in law who is convinced you're
starving the baby by breastfeeding, or the Pediatrician
whose medical advice strays into parenting advice, happy
Moms learn not to give too much weight to the opinions of
those who don't live in their home.
8) In other words, they trust their instincts.
Whether it's taking the baby to bed with them so they can
get more sleep or taking a bullied child out of public school,
smart Moms know that they are the expert of their own
babies.
9) Happy Moms have "something else"
It may be a part time home based business or a hobby like
belly dancing. These Moms know that some day their
babies will fly the coop, and they make sure they have a
passion that will give them purpose when that happens.
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About the Author
Carrie Lauth is the host of www.NaturalMomsTalkRadio.com
and she invites you to claim your free natural mothering
newsletter at www.Natural-Moms.com
Carrie Lauth is the host of www.NaturalMomsTalkRadio.com
and she invites you to claim your free natural mothering
newsletter at www.Natural-Moms.com
By Carrie Lauth
